Too good to not post

Through a journalists' listserve, I got a solitication from a Pakastani source-for-hire offering his punditry services to reporters covering the earthquake.
It's "clear as crystal" that his skill with the English language should make him sought after throughout the "orb." (It's worth "gazing" on his personal Web page for more laughs. It reminds me of the way the Ukranian guy wrote letters in the book "Everything is Illuminated").

Here's the pitch:

I shall feel gratified and delighted if the information, being listed
herein in disseminated through splendid helix of knowledge, SAJA
[saja-disc@lists.jrn.columbia.edu] to the eventual benefit of all those
who are interested to engage an bona fide source to get hold of latest
info on the catastrophic Quake in South Asia, explicitly in Pakistan.

QUAKE:Credible Journalist available in Pakistan

For authentic, comprehensive and update scenario on Quake in Pakistan and
Kashmir, please Contact:

Mumtaz Hamid Rao
Ex-Director [Head] News & Current Affairs Pakistan TV
Editor-in-Chief, 'Pakistan Times' [Daily Web Newspaper]
Post: Box # 2008 GPO Islamabad 44000 [Pakistan]
Tel: 0092 51 44 33 110 [Direct]
Cell: 0092 300 512 3000
0092 304 516 7000
Web: www.PakistanTimes.net
E/Mail: Post@MumtazRao.net
mumtazrao@hotmail.com

With fluent style of conversation in English, Mr. Rao is fully capable
even for LIVE Telecast/Broadcast by any Radio or Television network—the
world-over.

Offer of Fee [to be paid for each story/interview] may also please be
indicated, if and when any print or electronic media—from anywhere around
the Orb—gets in touch, any-time round-the-clock with Mr. Rao, a
journalist of global repute with a marvellous perspective, spanning over
35-years.

The level of his skill, talent and knowledge can be gazed by visiting
Rao’s personal website: www.MumtazRao.net where ever feature of his
journalistic experience lays as clear as crystal.

Sincerely Yours,

Mumtaz Hamid Rao